Nordstrom’s Return Policy Isn’t as Good as Advertised

 Nordstrom’s is almost as well known for its return policy as it is for being a luxury shopping store. There are unbelievable stories all over the internet covering how wonderful and unexpected the return policy is.

Several years ago, they did change part of the policy, no longer accepting special-occasion dresses if the tags had been removed. No problem. We all know from sitcoms that those dresses are bought, worn to the event and returned to the store whenever possible, so stores need to protect themselves. The remainder of their policy is vague, at best.

It clearly says there is no time limit for returns or exchanges, but it also says they don’t really promise to accept any returns.

They also only refund in the way the original purchase was made, or with a Nordstrom’s gift card. You can’t bring in something which was purchased with a credit card and walk out with cash. Fine. No big deal. I’m sure I could find something to buy at Nordstrom’s - especially if I could get the credit for Nordstrom’s Rack instead.

It’s a different story of how I got the things I tried to return, but lets just say I know of a lot of things with the potential to return and have a couple. I took in two things as a test. I wanted to see if the return policy lived up to the hype.

I brought in a pair of earrings, with the original price tag still attached and the original receipt. The receipt verifies things like the earrings were purchased at Nordstrom’s in Topanga, July 15, 2014. The cashier was named Doris. The method of payment was a Nordstrom’s credit card. They were on sale, although no discounts were handwritten on the price tag or calculated by the cash register. The price tag was for the sale price, with the original price also printed on it.

I also brought in a watch, which was in the original packaging, clearly never used (not a scratch on it) and with the original price tag, although it had been removed from the watch and was just in the box. The hands on the watch hadn’t even been moved. They were in the factory setting of 7:25 with the second hand perfectly aligned over the hour hand.

I went to the special “returns” section of the store, thinking they might be more helpful with this unusual case than any regular cashier, even though store cashiers are able to take basic returns. The young man who helped me first tried to scan in the bar code on the receipt for the earrings. Even though I have the receipt, it is worn out and the bar code wouldn’t scan. He didn’t try typing the numbers in. Instead, he scanned the special little return tag that places like Nordstrom’s and Macy’s attach to items when you buy them. Theoretically, scanning the return tag will bring up all of the details of the shopping purchased during the same trip.

The scan turned up nothing in their computer system. I was really confused why the earring return wasn’t going well. I asked if there was anything we could do. He had his manager come over. She did the same thing - scanned the return tag. It didn’t bring up anything in the computer. She scanned the return tag on the watch. It also didn’t bring up anything.

I felt like I was talking to a character from Little Britain. “Computer says, ‘no.’”

“We can’t accept these returns.”

But you have the receipt, the price tag, the return tag and the obviously never worn item. “Computer says, ‘no.’”

And here comes the not great part of the return policy which Nordstrom’s doesn’t publicize. I was told this. I’m not making it up. “See on the tag where it says ‘anniversary?’ That means it was part of a special sale.” They don’t accept returns on those items once the special sale ends. Oh. But this doesn’t seem to match the on-line information which is someone shrugging like, “We’ll probably take it back?”

Apparently they don’t accept returns on “anniversary” items, things which are seasonal, things from brands they no longer carry, or only carry occasionally. “But you carry the watch brand?” “Yes, but that was a limited-edition watch. We can’t take it. Computer says, ‘no.’”

I asked if there was an easy way to determine if something was eligible to return without coming into the store. Yes. You look on the Nordstrom’s website. If they still sell it, you can return it. But if the item has gone on sale, you will probably only get the sale price returned, not the full purchase price. So anything you bought which sold out or was seasonal in any way, you probably can’t return. I wasn’t clear on if it has to actually be still available for sale, or if it could be something which shows up on their website as “sold out,” as long as it was still showing up on the website. Bottom line, if the computer can’t scan it, nothing will make the return happen. A person is not able to use their eyes and verify that the receipt, price tag, return tag and item all match up and are in perfect condition.

I left Nordstrom’s with the watch and earrings and the advice from the manager of “just sell them on eBay.” Like I didn’t already think of that myself! What brilliant advice! It would have saved me a lot of hassle if Nordstrom’s did what they brag about, but all that brag is is hot air.

Lost Cherry Luxuries

 According to Google, when converting milliliters to ounces, 1 US fluid ounce is the same as 29.5735 milliliters. For practical reasons, many converters equate 30 milliliters to one ounce. This, of course, is for liquids. When converting solids, measured in grams, to ounces, one ounce is 28.35 grams. More precisely, Google tells me that one ounce is 28.3495 grams, but I don’t want to quibble.

Many of the things I enjoy in life require that I learn these conversions, although I haven’t. Instead, I look them up whenever I need to figure out if something is a good deal or a bad deal. In solids, I use ounces and grams when buying my jewelry supplies. Silver is measured this way when bought wholesale. It would be unusual for, say, Tiffany’s to list the price of a bracelet per gram. They price things as things, including not only the cost of supplies but also labor, design, research and development, advertising, office overhead and CEO bonuses, amongst other things. But if you take that same item to a pawn shop, you might be surprised when they pull out a scale and base the price on the weight of the metal. Although if you took in Tiffany jewelry, you would be surprised because they wouldn’t do this. JTV jewelry would probably be priced based on the scale. I think we all know that the cachet of something being from Tiffany’s means it will cost more than the sum of its parts.

My pandemic hobby of perfumery is also measured this way. Although, confusingly, some companies will tell you the amount of liquid you are buying in ounces while some with stick to milliliters. A small, purse size of perfume will often be either 9 or 10 milliliters, or .3 ounce. While larger bottles, although often really measured in milliliters, will be described in ounces. Common sizes are 100 milliliters (3.4 ounces) and 50 milliliters (1.7 ounces), which is why the ounce numbers are unusual. Many cosmetics are measured this way.

More expensive perfumes aren’t necessarily seeing the cost translated entirely in the juice (the perfume oils in the alcohol liquid). The higher-end fragrances I have tried also spend a fair amount of money on the packaging. An expensive purse/travel spray ($60-$100) will be in a nice, sturdy case. A less expensive one ($30) will just be in a glass vial.

I took my most recent perfume acquisition, a 10 mil bottle of Tom Ford’s Lost Cherry, over to a friend to get her opinion of it today. At $75, that little bottle of perfume is priced at $225/ounce. Compare that to silver, at around $28/ounce as of writing, and gold, at just under $1900/ounce today. That bottle of perfume is on the high end of the cost of printer ink, but not outside the realm of possibility.

Although I’d like to pretend I’m find with spending $225/ounce for perfume, that is high for me. I might be able to justify buying something extravagant like that occasionally, but I have trouble getting past “what would my dad think” to really enjoy the expensive thing, whatever the expensive thing might be. Which is why I got on the waitlist for the $75 version. But that is still expensive enough that when the perfume arrived, on a Thursday afternoon, I debated if I should spray any on my arm or not. There was no one around to smell me. I was just a couple of hours away from my nightly shower. My cats probably wouldn’t care how good I smelled. But I sprayed it. Just one spray.

To me, the scent opens with cherry liquor, which quickly dries down to a blend of brimstone and cherries. You might be thinking that brimstone isn’t a great thing for a perfume to smell like, but when I say brimstone I mean the Sulphur/fire/wood combination which fills the air after a match is struck. A fire in the fireplace or on the beach, both of which tease the idea that roasted marshmallows are in the not-to-distant future. For me there is a specific memory of when my mom taught CCD and we needed to prepare for a craft where we were going to make crosses from wooden matchsticks. My mom didn’t want to light and douse hundreds of matches, so I got the job. She sat me down in the back yard with some safety supplies (probably an ashtray and some sand) and boxes of matches. Strick each one, blow it out and knock off any of the remaining bulb of Sulphur so the matchstick was smooth. Repeat.

From the few sprays I’ve allowed myself of Lost Cherry, this is the scent that lingers for me… Brimstone and cherries.

My friend, before I told her the name of the perfume, said “powdery.” After I said cherries, she could smell them. She liked it, but I don’t think she was as enamored with it as I am.

I will complain, though, that the atomizer unscrews on this spray. This might seem like a good thing, especially for people who want to make small samples of the scent to sell on eBay, but for me, this is a disaster waiting to happen. My life is the convergence of cats, clutter and occasional clumsiness, so an expensive perfume which could open and spill onto the floor is anxiety-inducing.

I have made this perfume purchase in June, but I think the perfume is better suited for autumn or winter. I’m not sure I’ll wait, though.  

It's All About Perception

 Not all tape measures are created equal. Unless you buy a calibrated or certified measuring tape, it is legal for the measuring tape to be off of accuracy by 1/32 of an inch for every six feet. I would imagine if you pick up a cheap measuring tape at the dollar store, the accuracy could be off by more than that. Same goes for rulers. And scales. Unless you are using an expensive scale at the doctor, there will be some margin of error.

 Imagine, these things which we assume are fact, like how long an inch is, have some wiggle room. It depends on your tools and how accurate they are. Aside from this being good to know and a reason to always use the same measuring tape when working on a project, it makes you wonder about how differently things can be perceived.

 I have tinnitus, and have for as long as I can remember. A constant buzzing/ringing in my ears. The closest thing I can think of to describe it to someone who doesn’t have tinnitus is, you know the noise crickets and cicadas make? Now imagine that a little bit higher in pitch and never-ending. Every once in a while it will end, for a second or two. Like all of the sound suddenly sucked down a drain. But it quickly returns and there it stays. Putting my hands over my ears just means I can hear it better. I’m used to it, but it is part of my perception of the world. The world buzzes. All the time.

 Think back on that infamous blue/black dress. To me, it always and only looked blue and black. But my perception doesn’t match the perception of a lot of people. We all have different experiences, so different that something which we think should be a “fact,” like the color of something or what “quiet” is, don’t match up from person to person.

 I bet about now you’re wondering how I’m going to bring this back around to perfume, which seems to be all I can talk about lately. Here we go!

I’ve been trying out various perfume samples the last few weeks. I always start the same way, spraying them on a piece of paper, or a tissue, or a napkin, and smelling them on the paper. One of the ones I got, as soon as I smelled it on the paper I said, “No!” and moved the paper away. But I know that things smell differently once you put them on, so I tried that one on, and…I like it. I like it when it is actually on me. The ginger which repelled me from the paper doesn’t stand out when I wear the perfume. In fact, the perfume in question, Whispers of Time, is so light and subtle, I can’t smell it on my skin after a couple of hours.

I debate with myself if a perfume which last such a short time is good or bad. And actually, it’s both. It’s good because it gives you the opportunity to put on something else after a few hours, but bad if you wind up just putting the same thing on, since the bottle won’t last as long. It is also good if the perfume you tried on turns out to be a stinky mistake. It doesn’t linger and make you regret the spray.

Similarly, the Mickey & Minnie perfume smelled overpoweringly like vanilla on the paper. But I tried it on and found it much nicer once I was wearing it. I get a lot more of the coconut on my skin, and the fragrance is lighter on my skin than on the paper, so I don’t feel like I’m drowning in vanilla and coconut.

 I broke down and got the big bottle of Mickey & Minnie. Here it is: 

Look at that! Such a nice bottle. And it came in a black and gold fancy box. I was going to buy Whispers of Time, but it was out of stock when I made my purchase.

Why now? you may be asking yourself. I mean, I’m not done collecting the Trend purse sprays yet. Why would I move on to the large bottles? Two reasons. Mickey & Minnie is limited edition and might not be available by the time I really figure out if I am committed to it. And they were giving away some items with purchase. So I purchased. For Whispers of Time and Mickey & Minnie, my perception changed when the delivery method of the scent changed. From paper to skin. It made a difference.

The gift with purchase was a full-sized perfume called Whispers of Innocence and a matching lipstick holder bow, with a tube of lipstick. I also got a sample of Whispers of Innocence, which seemed a little thoughtless to me. Hey, if you like the big bottle you just got, why not try it in a small bottle to consider buying a big bottle!

I don’t understand why the bow lipstick holder doesn’t come with a lipstick as standard. It should. But that is a complaint for another day.

 Whispers of Innocence has a lot of jasmine in it. But to me, when sprayed on paper, it smells like gardenias. I researched if jasmine and gardenia are thought to smell the same. The answer is no. But to me, in this perfume, they do. I have jasmine growing in my yard, so I think I know what it smells like. And I’ve smelled gardenias before. But this perfume, meant to smell of jasmine smells of something else to me.

I love the little queen bee on the lid. I haven’t decided yet to take the plunge and graduate it from paper to skin. I think it will have to happen very close to shower time the first time, so I can go wash it off if it doesn’t settle on me. I took a chance on a gift with purchase, and it might not have worked out. Anyway, the bottle is really cute.

I also expanded my collection of the Trend sprays with the Trend#4, United We Stand. Wow. It STINKS! I have to classify this as the worst of that collection, so far. Very strong, very lingering. So… I don’t think I can even get past the smell enough to try it on my skin. And just because I think it stinks, doesn’t mean everyone will think it stinks. It’s supposed to be comprised of frangipani (which is another word for plumeria) and parijata (which is another word for jasmine). 

Similar to when I make jewelry, I understand that not everyone shares my taste. I will always remember being commissioned to make a blue, black and purple necklace. Left to my own whims, this never would have happened. And even though I didn’t like the result, my client was happy.

 Not only do we all perceive things differently, we can’t take for granted that the things we think we all perceive the same, are the same. Or accurate. Or the same across different locations. If you want to smell like flowers vomited on you, go for it. I’ll pass.

More About Perfume: Trying to Appreciate House of Sillage

 

After showing some love for Fragonard, I’ve been thinking more about the perfumes in my life.

 Perfume is tied into many of my memories. I can remember what perfumes I wore in middle school and high school. How my mom loved to buy perfume and would give me and my sister a bottle each Christmas. It wasn’t Christmas to her if she couldn’t buy some perfume.

She had a few favorites. When I was really little, my mom wore L’Air du Temps. I’ll always associate the scent with her.

After church every Sunday, we would go to eat, more often than not at the mall food court where our (me, my mom and my sister) diverse tastes could be accommodated. Usually that meant parking at a major department store and walking through it on the way to the main inside of the mall, always passing the fragrance counter. Always stopping to smell at least a few of them on the way by.

I wore White Diamonds for a time. Then Passion. Or vice-versa. Elizabeth Taylor was big in the perfume world when I was growing up. Perry Ellis 360 had a short stint on my dresser counter. It was a complicated fragrance, though. Some days I liked it, other days not so much. Followed by Tuscany by Lancôme. It was much too mature for me at the time, and still a little stodgy.

One year my mom gifted me a bottle of Red Door. I was confused. It was because I had gone on a vacation and taken a small sample-sized bottle of red door with me as my travel perfume. It was out of convenience that I took it, not because I liked the fragrance. We returned that bottle and got something else.

When I was in France in 1996, I found Eau Belle d’Azzaro. It had light citrus notes with deep pepper underneath. At least it smelled like pepper to me. (It doesn’t have any pepper in it.) I stuck with that as my main fragrance for many years. I still have two bottles from those Christmases.

Then came Le Monde Est Beau by Kenzo. It smelled like magnolias to me. My mom liked a lot of the same perfumes I did. Then Light Blue by Dolce and Gabbana. I often return to light citrus scents, even though they don’t linger.

 

Anyway, targeted Facebook ads. Sometime last year, I started getting targeted ads by House of Sillage. The company offered two things I love: perfume and excellent packaging. I browsed the website, but was discouraged by the prices. Could I afford to spend $1000 on one bottle of perfume? Maybe? And if I decide to get one, you can bet I’m splurging on a limited-edition bottle. But was I willing to take the chance on it, nose unknown? No.

But the ads kept coming, and I was constantly tempted. Lucky for me, they have travel sprays which are much more affordable. And a good way to try something before making a real investment in it.

The first travel spray I bought was The Trend #5 (Tropical Jungle). It’s supposed to be Tunisian neroli, Bulgarian rose and Tolu balsam. I have misplaced the box with the second refill bottle in it, but meh. Did I like it? Not at all. Did I like the travel container? You bet. Was I done trying out these perfumes? No.

 

I have bought two more travel sprays. The Trend #3 and The Trend #10. I’ll admit it. I’m shopping based on packaging and not at all on what the perfume might smell like. Luckily, these were much more to my taste.

I adore the packaging on The Trend #3 (Beauty & Grace). According to the website it is orange flower, black tea and powdered sugar. I’ve had it for several weeks, but it isn’t my go-to scent. And as an aside, those cute little boxes are difficult to open.

 

 

I just got The Trend #10 (Lace Up). Calla Lily, jonquil and freesia musk. I like this one the best, so far. My biggest problem is that the scent disappears on me almost instantly.

 

 

I also got some samples with my purchases. I have a sample of the limited-edition Mickey & Minnie Collection fragrance. Bergamot, mandarin, orange blossom, coconut milk, amber and vanilla. The vanilla comes through the strongest for me at first, settling into coconut, cut with sharp notes of the mandarin.

 

 

And I have a sample of The Trend #9 (City Dreams). Jasmine, praline, musk. Thoughts on it, so far, is that it is ok. Maybe I’ll buy a travel version of it next. I'm still not convinced that the House of Sillage products are worth the money. They are beautiful, but I haven't found the scent that blows me away, yet. I'll keep trying.

 

 

One thing a lot of these perfumes have in common, in addition to sparking memories, is that they make me long for a different scent. Lately, I’ve been trying to catch a memory of the scent of Japanese honeysuckle. We had a large bush growing in our backyard in Texas. I would go outside, pick the flowers and suck out the sweet drop of nectar from them when I was little. I’d like to get a more tangible version of that memory back.